Who is the wife of CPH?

I’m a wife and a mother. If my husband was being questioned in the disappearance of a woman, during the time I was at work, would I be covering for him? I may have had my doubts and questioned my intuition, but when her clothes and body were found in my backyard and 10 other bodies were found just down the street from me, I would be f’ing OUT OF THERE! I would go to the police with everything I knew and get him thrown in jail.

Especially for her daughters’ sake.



Blast from the past

“The only thing he’s guilty of is being late for dinner.” -Barbara Hackett

He must have been late to dinner often if that’s the shortcoming of his that first pops into her mind.

I bet if it was one of Barbara’s daughters who were murdered by a serial killer, she’d want the help of the killer’s wife to bring justice for her daughter.


19 thoughts on “Who is the wife of CPH?

  1. Barbara H. says:

    While I was learning how to stitch people up my husband the good doc was out chopping up innocent young women…. if I only had the courage to leave him and stand up for myself and children the world would be a safer place…… im sorry people!

  2. . says:

    This is How To aimed at aspiring murderers from varying backgrounds. Perhaps you’re angry with those damn neighbours who just don’t show you the respect you deserve? Maybe you’re rich and bored? Murder is easy, but most people find out too late that avoiding comeuppance is the tricky part. Thankfully you’re one of the clever ones who will be prepared to cross the line. No sitting in jail, sobbing as you wait for your next turn as Bubba’s bitch. You shall murder with impunity, for you are prepared. Let’s begin your journey in to darkness.


    The definition of the perfect murder is the killing of one or more people without being caught, fined or sent to prison.


    Motives are your reason to commit murder. They can be logical or illogical. They are often used by police, detectives, FBI, CSI, or any other authority to capture criminals. It may be better to murder someone you don’t know. Be aware that the more murders you commit, the more likely you are to be caught. You may develop an M.O, which would allow you to be apprehended.

    So the best way to avoid being caught is to be totally random. However, this may be unsatisfying, so let’s consider why we would murder someone we know:

    They slept with your wife/husband/sister/brother/daughter/son/boyfriend/girlfriend
    They won’t sleep with you
    They attempted to kill you, or a close relative/friend
    They are of a different faith/religion than yourself
    They are better than you

    A Brief Explanation of Physical Evidence

    Physical evidence is something left behind at or near the crime scene that would point to you as responsible for the murder. Even if you lie and claim you were not responsible, if physical evidence is present you will still be caught (except in a few cases). In order to perform a perfect murder, you must ensure the absence of physical evidence.

    Before attempting a murder, you must read this passage: Locard’s Exchange Principle

    Although Locard’s Exchange Principle may be true, you must prove it false in your murder by clearing up every possible evidence that the police can search to arrest you. You must ensure that you do not leave anything behind. That is the whole point in a Perfect Murder.

    Your perfect murder

    Let’s now step-through the planning and execution of your perfect murder.

    Step 1: Your Location

    You should not murder on a chat show watched by millions. If you do, you’re as stupid as shit. Got it?

    OK, before we start all this, let me declare that YOU MUST WEAR GLOVES BEFORE ATTEMPTING A MURDER. With modern technology, police can search for your fingerprints. With thick gloves, fingerprints will not be left behind.

    Also, do NOT leave anything behind that the police can do to collect your DNA. Fingerprints aren’t the only things that can be searched for DNA. Your hair or any kind of discretion your body makes (Sweat, spit, urine, sperms, semen, menstrual blood or even your shit) can be collected to check for your DNA.

    Do not chose a location that can be readily linked to you or your victim. Consider a rarely frequented location, such as an abandoned warehouse. Do not phone your victim or send a letter inviting them to meet you there. You are not asking this person for a date, and you certainly do not want to leave any evidence of your being there.

    A chat room could be used, but be sure to use a computer at a location that cannot be linked to you. Most successful murderers operate in areas far from their home. When traveling to this location, alternate your route and avoid retaining evidence of your travels – such as bus tickets and souvenir T-shirts. Pay with cash, and avoid using your ATM card en-route.

    tep 2: Your Weapon

    There are literally thousands of weapons available to you. Be careful to chose one appropriate to the setting, and one that you are comfortable using. The weapons used to put-down a slave revolt or a zombie attack aren’t necessarily appropriate for a discrete murder at the opera. Consider the following:

    Heavy object
    Gun (With silencer)
    A pillow
    Weapons of Mass Destruction

    You could also use average shoe laces to commit a murder, which can be used to cut off the air supply to a victim.

    Step 3: The murder

    Try to make the murder look like suicide. This is achieved by rubbing the weapon on your victim when you are finished. It collects their DNA. Note that this strategy will prove ineffective if you killed the person by stabbing them in the back.

    You must quickly dispose of your clothing and anything else that could link you to the crime. Far too many murderers have been caught when a random traffic cop pulled them over for speeding and noticed a severed head on the passenger seat.

    Consider these advanced techniques relating to specific weapons:

    Apply the knife to the victim’s neck, wrist, chest, or back of the legs. These are the location of major arteries and veins. However, this spills blood, try making the victim stand on a large piece of plastic sheeting that covers your location’s room. Then, set fire to it. Simple.

    Heavy Object
    Whack your victim until their screams end, and perhaps until the voices in your head stop crying out for blood. Mother, why don’t you love me as much as daddy?

    Burn them to death by trapping them in a small room. This is risky, since fire may be difficult to control.

    Invite the victim to a sleep over. When they’re drowsy, hold the pillow over the face and don’t let go until they stop wriggling, or when the victim has already fallen to sleep, seize the opportunity.

    Step 4: Removing the Evidence

    If you follow this simple guide you will carefully and systematically remove all evidence. Do not miss out any stages – it will result in an Imperfect Murder:

    If using a weapon that draws blood, ensure that you clean the murder scene or otherwise destroy it with fire. Note that excessive tidiness is in itself suspicious, so avoid getting blood on anything that will be seen by others. If you intend to murder the person in a property owned by you, prepare beforehand. Consider coating the room in plastic wrapping.

    If you intend to make a career of murder, you should consider establishing multiple identities, and you must always have a clear escape plan for each location in which you live.

    Step 5: Dispose of the corpse

    A simple and easy way to deal with the corpse is to burn it. However, burning rarely destroys all evidence. You should either chemically prepare a fire so that it burns at around 800 degrees celsius, or return to collect the remains for disposal. A remote body of water is an ideal choice. Also dumping the body into the sea is also very effective… just don’t be that quick to dump them near the shore. Plan carefully and dump it way out there; international you could say. Tip cut the body up first. Remove the important organs like fingers, teeth, feet and ears.

    This step may be unnecessary if you tend to leave the corpse behind to mislead the police.

    Step 6: Blame Someone else

    The classic lesson of politicians and business leaders alike will serve you well. As well as keeping yourself free from blame, you may intent to frame someone else for the murder. Perhaps this is to aid your evasion of the authorities, or maybe it’s linked to your motive for the murder.

    In the unlikely event that the police suspect your involvement, the following approaches may be used in order to make you confess:

    Guilt trap – they will tell you about the family’s anguish, and how the victim suffered. They will make you want to make yourself suffer as a penance. Avoid guilt, kill someone without family, who cannot feel pain. Or, you can do the opposite – kill his whole family. It’ll be harder, but you must do it or else you’re in trouble. You’ve already murdered a person. That proves that you’re cold blooded. It doesn’t hurt to kill more people, right?
    The Bad Cop routine – they unplug the CCTV camera, swivel their chair round and mount it rodeo style. This is their way of telling you you’re about to get ridden. They will beat the confession out of you. But this is very unlikely to happen.
    Polygraph test – these can be beaten by making your responses erratic. When asked calibration questions, think of sexually exciting imagery or tense your sphincter muscles. By causing unusual calibration, the fluctuations caused by your lies will fail to be noticed.

    The police can do nothing about you if you don’t have enough evidence. So remember – don’t leave any evidence behind.

    If you manage to get past Step 6, then I shall congratulate you – you have completed your murder successfully. Now, be calm and stop murdering people for a while, OK?

    P.S. – Delete this from your internet history too.

  3. . says:

    And yes he used to be enthusiastic. I guess it was when we moved in together that our sex life slower down I’m a lot of ways. Maybe he feels like he owns me now so he doesn’t have to try anymore.

  4. . says:

    What’s hard is feeling lied to. I wasn’t given a choice. I know that people change over time but it feels so soon and sudden. I am usually the one in relationships who doesn’t want it as often or is having the other person ask for things I’m not a huge fan of.
    It’s hard being 40 and feeling like the whole sexual pattern has reversed. I used to be pursued. Now I’m the pursuer. I’m the one who wants things the other doesn’t. I think he is willing to work on it. It just feels like such a rejection of my body. I love his body and I wish he would see my vaguna and think its beautiful. Not a smelly thing he can put his penis in but not his mouth.
    I know a lot of this is stuff I need to work on. It’s just hard. He started IC last week for stress, I am hoping eventually he or we can talk about the differences in libido and what we want.
    Also I need to work on not taking sex so personally. Again a complete 180 from where I was 20 years ago. If we go from 3x a week to once a week and he’s saying no bc he’s tired I equate that with something being wrong with the relationship.
    Fact is sometimes it is. It has been in my experience in the past. It’s to me a sign that someone isn’t as happy with us or that they are depressed or building resentment when their desire takes a plunge. He reassures me that it has nothing to do with his feelings for me. It’s hard for me to accept but I know on some level it’s true. I’m just so focused on sex as an expression of love, like a guy.

  5. . says:

    I guess what I’m asking is how do you stop dwelling on it? My body has a long history of a certain kind of orgasm and stimulation and I feel physical cravings for it.

  6. . says:

    I’m not willing to let this end the relationship but I need to know how to let it go when I feel physically unfulfilled. It’s not just mental. It’s like you have orgasms that are a ten and find out its just going to be 5’s for the rest of your life.

  7. . says:

    I’m a squirter too so I do wonder if that is part of it. But I have told him he can put a towel down there and just focus on the clitoris.
    I guess I need to accept that this isn’t going to go away and like a drug addict I’m
    going to think about it but it’s my choice if I let it ruin things.
    And he is amazing. I feel bad that I can’t just accept it!

  8. . says:

    I think he gets unsettled by how easy it is for me to have an o. He tends to be the type who wants to pursue and seduce. Last night we had sex and I don’t know what happened but I couldn’t feel anything. I started checking out mentally and he was really working hard to get me to O. I just felt numb. We ended up having a long drawn out fight and discussion. It was so draining but we got some things out there. He said that the bad taste and smell has happened a couple of times. I told him I can shower and clean before sex. He said that he is willing to work on it. I explained to him that there are different kinds of orgasms and how it makes me feel rejected and unattractive. I don’t understand how he can put his penis there but not his mouth. At first he was very angry and upset.
    I kept asking him why he’s so angry and he said maybe we should just separate. I told him I don’t want to lose him. I asked if he wanted to just stay together and be there for each other and the kids and have sex be not a part of it. That we could both find other people to do that with. He said no way, that’s not what he wants.
    He told me that it bothers him that he has to do anything to hurt me or make me feel bad and I think that’s why he gets angry. He said he just shuts down because this whole thing is so unusual for him compared to his first marriage.
    He told me some other things I’ve been doing that he isn’t happy about. He thinks I drink too much. I don’t think that I have a problem but I told him if it makes feel uncomfortable I will stop or just not do it as much. He said he worries about it all the time. Actually he ended up writing all this stuff down and have it to me, told me he didn’t have the courage to come out and say it. I told him that if he has issues with me I want to know what they are.

    This part confuses me. We were talking about masturbation. How he doesn’t want me to do it, and he said its because he feels competitive. I don’t know what that means. I tried to explain to him that it’s normal and no matter how much sex I have I’m still going to want to do it. I don’t feel like it takes anything away from us. It’s part of human sexuality.
    I guess I inadvertently did a sexual 180. It seems like ever since we’ve been together I have always been the one who wants it more, I hardly ever turn him down. I O so easily. I think it’s good that he sees I’m not a sex machine and that if things go bad between us I can’t enjoy myself.

    The thing is we both had really bad marriages and we’ve been together for two years. I don’t think you can just give up on someone. I’m not willing to go through another divorce so I can have meaningless sex or be celibate and then find someone else to be with and drop them when they’re not perfect.
    If he weren’t willing to work on things I don’t know what I would do but I think we both understand each other more now.
    I asked him to look at the marriage builders website and he said he would, he said he is glad he’s with someone who wants to work on the relationship.
    SometImes it feels like between our kids, our exes, our families, jobs, health issues and just stress we put our marriage last. We had such an amazing connection and so much love and I think we both forgot that we need to work on us too.
    I’m just so glad that he’s opening up to me. He started IC and he wants to do that for a while and then do MC.

  9. . says:

    Well I guess I stink. It really hurts because I haven’t had anyone say that before. But apparently I do. And apparently his ex smelled like a fresh spring day.

  10. . says:

    He didn’t say anything about his ex but before he met me he loved giving oral so what am I supposed to think?
    I even asked him about it and he didn’t want to talk, just said that he was always trying to get her off. I asked him if I stop having orgasms will he do it to me and he didn’t answer. Well guess what. Now I’m not having orgasms or enjoying myself.

  11. . says:

    I’m just losing it because this reminds me of my first marriage do much. I feel like its all going to blow up now. I wish I didn’t have to be like this.

  12. . says:

    I realized what’s really bothering me is that he doesn’t want me to masturbate. I tried to ignore it but the more time goes on and his drive decreases the madder I get. And it’s not to say that I don’t do it. It triggers memories of men abusing me and thinking they own my
    body. He says it makes him feel like he isn’t meeting my needs. Well
    first of all you’re not. So I should just ge frustrated because you aren’t in the mood?
    One night a few months back I tried to get him
    to have sex and he didn’t want to. So he went to take a shower. I opened up
    the container of lube and thought of he saw it or heard it, it might turn him on. He heard the click of it opening and came out of the bathroom infuriated that I would dare do that.
    It’s a side of him I hardly ever see. I couldn’t believe it.
    He apologized and said he didn’t know why he’s like this. After I told him if he wasn’t going to do it I would take care of it.
    The situation hasn’t changed. I’m frustrated and angry that I have to sneak around and feel like I’m doing something wrong, like he owns my body.
    It all came to a head this week I guess. He’s agreed to work on it in therapy.
    I asked him if his ex ever got off on her own a d he didn’t want to talk about it.
    I think half our problems are because I’m
    the 2nd woman he’s been with.

  13. . says:

    I don’t think he is gay. Bi maybe but not gay. And that’s a whole other story..,I do wonder if he is afraid he is bi or has bi thoughts and he doesn’t want to deal with it because then he thinks he’s gay. I don’t know how I ended up with a prude. Good lord. I guess the sex was so great at the beginning and he is great when he’s really in the mood. It’s hard to believe sometimes I’m only the second. But then I’ve been with guys who had lots of experience who were awful in bed.
    I think he just doesn’t want me to think that he did things with her that he won’t do with me.
    I think he like being the one who wanted it more and he can’t handle someone who wants it more than him. It’s like he feels like it makes him less of a man…prob related to her rejection of him. I’m convinced she couldn’t handle his cross dressing but she never would admit it.
    So he’s always waiting for me to reject him.
    And here I am letting him have his female clothes in the closet instead of boxes, letting him have toe nail polish and wear female panties. It doesn’t bother me. So who is the one who has issues with him being a cross dresser? Sounds like its him.

  14. . says:

    Oh and he says it doesn’t bother him but I wonder if he doesn’t feel bad that I’ve had a lot more experience than him. I’ve never been
    with someone who could keep up with me at this point so theres nothing to compare him to. It’s not like I’m a major ho but 15 compared to 2 is quite a difference.

  15. Barbara H. says:

    Don’t be so cocky honey…I might start singing. If your crime was so perfect we wouldn’t be in the situation we are now. There’s nothing that exculpates you from these crimes, that’s the part that really bothers me. You’ve killed women and destroyed our family and theirs. If you call this “the perfect crime” you’re sicker than I thought….what happened to the petee I married?

  16. . says:

    k here it goes,when my husband fingers me I squirt liquid from my vagina. Sometimes it’s white and other times it’s clear. It never has an odor or taste. I have multiple orgasms when he touches me and every time I squirt, sometimes it’s large amounts of fluid and other it’s small amounts. I am embarrassed by this but he loves it and thinks it’s sexy…..so my question is, is this normal and if it is why does the amount differ so much each time and why is it white sometimes and clear others? Thanks for listening and answering my question.


    Gut your kids.

  18. BabylonBarry says:

    Who cares about Mrs cph. She looks like a tranny. All the more reasons for peg leg to become a “hobbyist” but stiff the bill. No pun intended.

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